When my daughter sleeping “habits” changed during the day and night I didn’t made much of it. Her health was great, she was not in any way showing signs of being sick. I went with it without truly understanding what was happening.
As the days went by and I began to dread our nightly routine I realised something was up. Duh ! I did some research on the web and came across a few terminology such as "Bad Sleeper" or "Sleep Regression". I am not the type to believe everything I read. I am the kind that will make research about the research I've made and dig deep until I find something that connects with who I am and how I raise my child. I will take a moment to clear the air, there isn't such thing as a "bad child" or "bad sleeper".
Initially, after the second day of this “new sleep routine” she had “adapted” I thought ; Maybe she is teething — although she never was a "sick" teether. I rarely understood when her teeth were coming out until I took a close look, she never had fever either.. I gave her medicine that night, more for the “just in case” purpose of things. It didn't help reduce her anger, tantrums and tears towards nap or bedtime.
I then thought, it may be that she doesn't want to sleep in her own crib, could have she already outgrown it ? As I posted previously about her climbing out of her bed in “Ninja Toddler” which btw is now problem fixed, we safely put her mattress lower then it was previously. Thanks hubby for his “mister fix a lot” skills !
I began my research late in the evening typing in the search bar of Google : 17 months old crying her self to sleep or 17 months old resisting nap time. A lot of sites popped to my screen which none made sense to me. To each teach their own. I have very strong beliefs in the way I want to raise my daughter, although I have no clue what I am doing most of the time — isn't that the definition of contradiction or what ? I somehow have this “ideal” that I want to pursue. The key to parenthood and in general “lifehood” is “knowledge is power”.
At first glance of “Sleep Regression” and blogs who praise the logic behind it, I must admit made me feel like I could put a name on the phase we were going though — you've got to understand, a desperate mum in lack of sleep with a toddler having tantrums at every nap or night is more likely to believe or put a label on a situation happening in exchange to some reassuring words like ; “oh my daughter is going through a Sleep Regression phase” but I quickly came to sense when I began to read about their philosophy and the terminology “regression” associated with children who are doing anything but regressing goes against my logic and their growth. Regression seemed like a negative choice of words for a negative phase which isn't the approach I needed.
I then look up different sites who were more in sync with my outlook on parenting. Sites that explains on a neurological level the behaviour causing children to have difficulties going or staying asleep when going through growth sprout, sites that acknowledge the psychological instability of toddlers. Sites that does not condemn helping your baby feeling secure as she grows through these intense developmental stages and lastly that made me feel like I did not have to justify my daughter behaviour with fancy labels or reasons for her waking. She simply is beautifully growing and her brain is big bright and very busy especially at night.
Lastly, the most important thing I have gathered from all this is that when your baby, who has been sleeping in peaceful dreamland suddenly began to wake more frequently it simply means he is approaching a real developmental milestone. Something to look forward too ! Mumhood is exhausting, challenging and so rewarding. All good “and bad” things comes to an end ! If you're also going through a difficult time regarding your baby’s sleep, you're not alone and it is perfectly normal, yes tiresome but completely organic.
Beezeemum